Heavyweights: humor helps the anxiety

So my brother was just joking around and said, "You should try to sneak some salamis into Quantico, you know, like those fat kids from the movie Heavyweights?"

I bursted out laughing, imagining the scene with a 300 lb version of me standing there and lifting up my olive drab t-shirt to reveal the salamis that I've ducktaped to my back. "Hey kid, get these salamis off my back!"

The Candidate, in utter horror, just looks at me and finally says, "How the hell did you pass your PFT?"